Don’t Be Stupid
Social media is not rocket science. But many people approach it as though there is some big secret to getting and retaining a following.
Once you get past the myriad sites; once you reach beyond the seemingly infinite and ever-growing arsenal of tools; and once you have read books teaching you how to become the social media expert that you know you can be… you’ll discover one simple truth that without which none of it really matters.
Authenticity.
What exactly does that mean?
It doesn’t mean sharing every little detail of your life, but it does mean sharing what’s on your heart and mind at the moment.
It doesn’t mean being inappropriate and risking relationships by over-sharing details of your personal life, but it does mean allowing people to see that you are a feeling, emotional human being who bleeds when he or she is cut.
It doesn’t mean venting a tirade which you will never be able to delete from the archives of the Internet, but it does mean that you are capable of sharing your frustrations in a healthy and constructive way.
Authenticity doesn’t give you license to be a fool. It gives you license to be who you are within the protective boundaries of wisdom. And if you ARE a fool, I suppose you will be authentically exposed as one.
It’s all about keeping it real, but engaging the rational part of your brain which should be programmed to understand one basic tenant of the internet…
“If you post it, it’s out there forever!”
In other words, don’t be stupid. 🙂
And if you do post something you later regret, it’s okay. You’re just human. It’s hard enough to hold our tongues in common social settings. Social media just makes it so much easier for our fingers to type faster than our brains can rationally process.
Being authentic means you are who you are. It’s not about your past mistakes. It’s not about what happens in the future. To be authentic means to live presently in the here and now.
That doesn’t take much effort. If anything it means that you don’t have to try so hard.
And that’s a relief.
As always, your comments are invited and welcome below.
There’s such a fine/fuzzy line between being real and being really ________. (Insert: annoying, whiny, arrogant…)
I want to be real and let people see the real Kelly. I’m good with exposing some flaws and admitting mistakes – but some folks really struggle with knowing where to stop and end up leaving others with the impression that they’re a _______. (Insert: Basket Case, Jerk, Perpetually Complaining Victim of the World…)
Can’t say I’m always good at spotting and staying behind the line LOL!
You probably need to sell some ‘Don’t Be Stupid’ stickers for folks to put on their computer monitors & smart phone cases 😉
Love it! Bumper stickers, too…
Some parts of social media are just too introspective. If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the years of using it, marketing on it, with it, and for it, it’s that there are some who will NEVER understand that you aren’t necessarily the social media you present. Sometimes, what you exchange on the medium is just that – an exchange.
If I took everything personally that people say on my social media, I’d be a basket case… Instead, I prefer to see that people have opinions, they have lives, and those sometimes cross, occasionally meet, but don’t always represent each other.
Stupid is a word that describes the intersection, not the person. Sometimes we have to acknowledge people’s opinions and allow them the freedom to express them, without attributing those opinions to the person’s reality, or personally feeling insulted by their expression.
Thanks for the reminder Joel.
Excellent insights and feedback Jan! Sometimes I write stuff on my blog, go back and read it, and wonder “what was I thinking?” But unless is egregiously off-base, I let it stand as a testimony to my flawed humanity.
Great post Joel it reminds me of what a mentor told me several years ago: “People want to learn about YOU… they want to *know* YOU, the person behind the business. Share with them, but share wisely.”
To me, this means sharing, as you say, what’s on my heart and mind and I enjoy reading what others have to share that is on their heart and mind. It shows me another side of them, perhaps a side that resonates with me more than what they typically share. Perhaps it doesn’t resonate at all. I simply respect them for having the courage to (wisely) share a bit about the person behind the computer monitor.
Great read… thanks again! 😀
Too many share too much! What you shared? Just right… thanks!
Connect, connect, connect, connect, and connect. It’s actually hard work to keep up with. – Scott Craighead
Which is why you have to run your social media life and not let it run you!
I’m connected most of the popular social networks and recently I joined LinkedIn. However, it did not pique my interest at all. After reading your post, however, I’m starting to see potential in this social site – Potential to reach a larger audience and grow my business. Thanks!
Hand-in-hand with the need for people to be careful posting is the need for corporate reviewers of SM (e.g., hiring managers, HR) to have some tolerance. To wit:
Casting the First Stone
http://davidhuntpe.wordpress.com/2013/07/26/casting-the-first-stone/
One thing I have learned over the years is Social Media be treated on par with offline scenario i.e We think before we say something(At least most of us). Although the after effects of posting something inappropriate is far larger than in the offline world.
Social media, which supposedly is a part of reality, instead becomes a new, an alternate reality.