My Last Good Year
I’m not sure how it crept up on me so quickly, but I turned forty-nine years old yesterday.
It seems like just yesterday I was graduating from college.
I’ve watched my kids grow to become young adults before my eyes. I’ve been in the internet business eighteen years. Time truly does fly.
As I look back on the day, I am incredibly grateful for the wonderful family, friends and associates in my life. Emails, skype chats, Facebook posts, LinkedIn messages, phone calls, unexpected gifts and even a recorded video of a friend singing Happy Birthday to me.
With my 50th birthday coming up next Cinqo de Mayo, it’s been said that I am entering my “last good year.”
Is forty-nine destined to be my last good year? It may be.
But that’s because I intend for every year after fifty to be GREAT!
As I look back at seasons of my life, it’s possible to apply stereotypes about people based on age groups.
For example, in my teen years I should have been hired to work for NASA. After all, I knew everything!
In my twenties, I was still immortal and the world was my oyster. You could try to tell me things, but I probably didn’t want to listen because I really felt that I knew what was up.
In my thirties, disillusionment set in. Perhaps I really didn’t “get it” after all, and I wondered if I was going down some wrong paths.
And in my forties, I finally became free to admit to, and embrace, my cluelessness!
Oh, it’s not that I don’t know a little about some things. And it’s not that I don’t have anything of value to say.
But in the big scheme of things, I am ignorant. Ignorant essentially means “not knowing.” By the way, I’m not the only ignorant person. You are too.
Don’t get all offended and storm off in a huff. Let me explain.
Picture a piece of white paper, 8 1/2″ x 11″ in dimension. Let’s say that piece of paper represented ALL knowledge in the world.
Now grab a pencil and make a shape that would indicate how much of that knowledge you can claim.
You couldn’t make a dot small enough that wouldn’t be overstating the percentage of all knowledge that you can claim for your own. It would be microscopic and insignificant.
So when we consider everything that can be known and compare it to what we actually know, we are incredibly ignorant beings.
Once we realize just how little we actually know, it opens us up to possibilities. Not just possibilities for what we may discover and learn next, but also for other people’s opinions, beliefs, thoughts and feelings that may differ from our own.
In the past, I fought very hard to be heard and to persuade people to my way of thinking. I daresay that I would sometimes come off as arrogant or judgmental. I still have very strong opinions, but I’ve found it very liberating to release others to believe, think and feel however they wish. I can’t control them and it is foolish for me to even try do so. (I’ll bet you know some people who do this, right?) So why should I let what others think rule what my head and heart are telling me to do and how I should live? What would give me the right to impose “my way” on other people?
It’s very liberating to come to a place of acceptance. This means not only accepting who you are, but in doing so, accepting that others are who they are. We can’t change one another!
I think all this means that the fifties are going to be incredibly exciting! Knowing that I don’t know anything means I don’t have to understand it all. I don’t have to get it “all right.” I can be fully human, with more than enough flaws to go around. I can accept myself, which allows me to become more accepting of others. Phew, that takes the pressure off!
Yes, I can carpe all the little diems I have the opportunity to carpe. And I can just be, enjoying the process of discovery.
That is an exciting notion!
More than ever, I understand what people mean when they say that age is just a stage of mind. I still FEEL like a young man and I have the same enthusiasm for the future. I still like to be silly, watch stupid movies, play computer games and laugh at farts. (Admit it, you do too.)
So why get “old” when I can approach each new day as an opportunity to grow, love and live more fully?
In fact, why should I wait for fifty to have a great year?
I think I just finished my last good year.
Starting today, I’m going to have a GREAT year.
How about you?
I look forward to being more creative. It’s one thing that gets better with age.
Joel, I love the way you are approaching this. And your stereotypes are spot on with my experience, at least up to this point. My 34th birthday was yesterday too, and surrounded by family & friends I was overcome with a sense of how blessed I was. It was a very humbling experience. Happy birthday my friend, and here’s to many more awesome ones to come.
Nah, it’s only your last good year if you’ve got nothing else to accomplish in life and nothing else to learn. That’s when age really creeps up. I think the rest just age gracefully. We get wiser and more tolerant because we look back and see everything in its true perspective – that whatever bothered you 5 or 10 years ago really wasn’t that big of a deal after all.
Happy Birthday Joel, and may the new journey take you where no man has gone before.
Happy Belated Birthday Joel. It seems you are 3 days older than me. I will be 58 this year 🙂 but I have to agree with you. This year will be a great year for me too. Finally I am starting to get over some of my fear of failure. It seems as I get older I realize I have less to lose by taking chances and if I want to make it online… I need to go for it because time is getting shorter.
God bless you Joel, Thanks for taking time to share your thoughts and being a constant encourager for us.
This year I turn par… 72… I wish I could remember when I was 49!
Congrats on the birthday. Being at the other end of the 50’s I can tell you I have been using this decade to learn so many things. It has been awesome. Enjoy every day of it!
Also turned 49 this year Joel! I remember being in my early 20s and the tennis coach at university said something like life doesn’t really start or get good until you’re in your 50s. I just believed that to be true.
This woman was so fit! If I recall correctly, she was the top tennis player in Canada in her age group (over 50 or 55?). Very few people in class could even return her serve!
The big 5-0h next year Joel! Not bad at 62 I am nowhere close to my last good year.
I feel, talk, walk and think young. If it wasn’t for the mirror I’d still think I was 25.
Happy B-day….and at least 50 more.
Paul
Happy Birthday Joel!
When my mother was in her eighties, I asked her how old she felt. Her reply was 36 until she looked in the mirror which reminded her that she was older.
So you are correct, age is a state of mind. Enjoy the years ahead!
A belated happy birthday Joel. It now seems that you know everything I always wanted to teach you 😉 So go forth and enjoy you new-found wisdom.
As for looking in the mirror. When I look in the mirror I do not see an older face, I see me. I don’t see the age of the person looking back, I see my soul and it is good and young and full of vigor and ready for anything new.
Every day is a new beginning of an endless journey and it is just getting better the more I learn about life. Not the small technical things we see as milestones in human endeavor but the essence of life.
I may be older than you in earth years but in soul… You’ve got a lot to look forward to.
Go for it.
God bless.
This is the first day of your 50th year of life so yes it is a MUST to begin today and make each day part of your great 50th year! Your already most of the way there dropping judgement, surrendering control, and living your life in a way that makes you happy. Happy Birthday and keep doing your good stuff.
My first Joel Comm blog post reading, and boy you hit the ball out of the park for someone that just knows a little. Right there is a mini book on the stages of life.
Your journey has just begun and like life itself journeys have unexpected twists and turns in them, it’s which path we take and what we learn from those choices that make us what we are today. Think about your twenties if you had made different choices your thirties would not have been the same, you may not have the knowledge you have now, the things we DID make us who WE ARE. We can’t go back and change anything but we can look at the sun each day, the mountains, the sky and thank god we get another day to learn.
Happy birthday. 3 months from today I’ll be 50. 50?? It’s only a few months ago I was 18, how can I be 50. 50 is like really old isn’t it? What happened to the last 32 years?
You know what, age doesn’t matter. Mentally I still feel like an immature teenager. I look in the mirror and it’s the same person staring back that’s been there all my life.
Enjoy every decade. I enjoyed my 20s, 30s and 40s and I’m sure going to get the most out of my 50s too. If I make it another 10 years on this planet then I’m going to enjoy my 60s too.
All the best